Surely our dignity does not die with suffering and pain?
Many of us have a view of the world that is very different to the person sitting next to you. You may love chocolate – they may not. You might think a 23 degree day is perfect – they may like it cold and prefer a 5 degree day. We all think differently.
Thank God for that too! Who would want to live in a world without debate, creativity and challenge? We would still be in the middle ages if it weren’t for the uniqueness each individual possesses.
But what happens when that opinion or free thought is not what the majority believe or think? What happens then?
Last week, Bride and prejudice aired an episode where a couple told their son that they were not going to attend his wedding in the US because they were against gay marriage. As you can imagine this sparked outrage and people (as they so often do on social media) began hurling insults their way, which were in my opinion completely unnecessary.
Now before you start hurling abuse at me, let me continue.
I found them unnecessary because I began to think about all of those times people would jump down my throat for things I believed in or things I thought we as a society should do. And they would badger me because what I thought was right, didn’t happen to coincide with the majority.
They would then explain to me that they had the right to think this and that, and also have the audacity to say that my thoughts and opinions were invalid or wrong – go figure.
We all have the right to free speech and to communicate our thoughts. You don’t have to agree with them, but you must make peace with the fact that some people will differ.
We don’t have to agree with what the mother did, but calling her names (behind a screen mind you) because she did something we wouldn’t do, makes you just as bad you think she is. It shows intolerance and elitism.
Let’s be a bit more open, let’s show the world this openness we claim to have.
What did you want to be when you were little? A fairy? A fireman? A policeman? Even perhaps a maid? Is that would would’ve made you happy or… successful?
Today I was asked an interesting 2-part question:
Who do you think is great at life? What makes them successful?
Now, this is a question I’ve been dealing with a lot lately so it didn’t take me by surprise, however I still hadn’t managed to formulate a proper response for myself let alone for someone else!
As I sat there eating my lunch I realised I knew what I had to say, but was a bit afraid as it’s not an opinion most people share.
So I answered the first part and I said “happy people”. This for me is what makes someone great at life. However, my response needed elaboration; let me explain.
Most people think happy people have money – wrong! That’s what you think makes people happy, but I’ve realised over time that it’s not true.
When I said “happy” I was talking about those people who no matter what type of life they lead, they wake up every morning knowing how lucky they are. They live everyday overcoming obstacles and realising their own strength and potential. For me, being great at life has nothing to with money, but everything to do with integrity and happiness.
Someone can be waitressing their whole life and absolutely love it. They wake up everyday happy with what they’re doing which deserves the utmost respect. Now, I wouldn’t be able to do that, but that’s because I am a different person, and just like people have different opinions on who is great at life, people have different opinions on who succeeds in life. Which leads to my response for the second part.
You earn heaps of money?! OMG you’re soooooo successful!!!
As we map out our path in life, we realise that becoming what we want to be may not be as easy or possible as we once thought. We hit walls, break bones, but worst of all we usually succumb to society and end up belittling jobs that are at times deemed unsuccessful.
Yet one thing our ego allows us to forget is that the world does not revolve around our opinion. After speaking with many people, everyone had different versions of success. And to say that someone is unsuccessful because they’re not living by your definition or by what society has painted as success is a tad elitist.
What constitutes success? Money? Fame? Your opinion? A big house? What? What makes one successful in life?
Not everyone can be a doctor, or a lawyer or whatever else society has deemed important and respectable. Everyone has a job to do and all jobs need to be done. Every job is important, and just because you may be raking it in, does not make you better then me or anyone else.
Don’t get me wrong, utmost respect if you have worked hard and are doing what you want and getting paid well for it! But you’re not more successful than the guy who decided he wanted to cook burgers for a living 😉
If I held everyone to my standard of success, I highly doubt I would think many are succeeding- I don’t think the majority of the world population speaks 5 languages!
So I guess what i’m trying to say with this long train of thought you’ve just read, is that if you’re happy doing what you love and are sharing that love with everyone else, you’re doing great at life and succeeding – not matter your pay, whether high or low.
I recently had my 24th birthday (I know, how young 😉 ) and I had planned this 24 hour extravaganza of 24 hour food and fun, yet when it came to the day, I got a fever which then resulted in gastro leaving me sick and at home. It had definitely not gone as planned.
I was devastated.
I had been anticipating this event for over 3 months and in the end, it had gone westward. I think i handled my disappointment well, however this got me thinking about how we react and deal with things when they don’t go our way. Whether it be a birthday, a job, a relationship or even an election, how we handle the situation makes it even the more better or worse.
I’m not one to dwell on things despite my dwelling nature. I don’t think it prudent to obsess over a particular fact or statement, especially if I can’t do anything to change it. It’s a strange comfort I find in knowing that what is done is done and come the next time to be able to do something about it, I will be ready.
So why is it that so many of us are so quick to have a massive sook if things don’t go our way? I understand disappointment and frustration, especially if there has been a lot of work involved but to blatantly deny what has occurred, just because you don’t like it, or focus on how it didn’t go your way is not good for you or for anyone else.
I think as a society we’re very much one of entitlement. And unfortunately, this leaves no room for failure.
We need to learn to accept the unacceptable because otherwise our lives will be in a state of constant tension, drama and anarchy – because guess what? Not everyone will always agree.
Don’t take me saying accept things as a justification for not doing anything about it. But if you know your actions are not going to bring about actionable change then let things go. I didn’t plan on getting sick for my birthday and nothing I do now will change that. I have to accept that it didn’t go my way and plan for the future – well, as much as I can ; )
Don’t let things get you down if they don’t go as planned. Being in denial rather than moving towards change won’t make things any better. Sometimes you have to make do with what you have.
Like most things, tastes change with the turn of a new season. For example, in winter I crave a piping hot cappuccino or a smooth, creamy latte. While in summer, it’s completely different – the iced latte makes a strong return.
Living in Melbourne means I am constantly surrounded by good coffee – at least almost always. I love that I can always be a walk away from a quality cup of coffee; it’s incredibly reassuring.
Everyone also tends to be aware of the standard coffees that are ordered: you’ve got your cap, your latte, flat white, long black, short black and espresso. No one seems to have an issue with them, no wires seem to get crossed. Unfortunately the same cannot be said for my beloved iced latte.
If I order one in the city, it’s safe to say I get what I ask for and for the normal running price too. However, as you move more and more out towards the suburbs I have unfortunately found that knowledge of said iced latte – a.k.a the perfect summer drink – is minimal. I cannot tell you the amount of times I have asked for an iced latte and been met with frowns of confusion, followed with “do you mean an iced coffee?”
Now I don’t usually rant about silly little things like coffee (not really that silly 😉 ) or other things that are really not detrimental, but I’m actually so over this *cry face*.
At first I was like oh ok, you don’t know what it is? That’s ok. I thought it was a one off thing, but the more I started to order it everywhere, the more people were like “sorry we don’t do that here”, “sorry I don’t know how to make that”, “sorry, sorry, sorry”.
AAAHHHHHHH I know many of you may not relate to this but I have found it incredibly frustrating that there are baristas who are unsure of how to make an iced latte! All it is, is cold milk poured over a cube (or cubes) of ice and the shot of coffee – that’s it! No ice-cream, no cream, no nothing – nothing extra. Just milk, an ice cube (or cubes depending on the size of your ice cubes) and the shot of coffee.
And to make matters worse, these places that have no idea what an iced coffee is, charge me almost DOUBLE the price of a normal coffee – you don’t even need to heat the milk up! why am I being charged extra?
Yes this is such a first world problem but this last one was the last straw.
To all the baristas out there, please learn how to make iced lattes – and learn the difference between it and an iced coffee (which includes cream and ice-cream). Pretty please 🙂 .
Now that I let my frustration out I feel better iced latte lover ❤